The Man Who Had To Grow Lavender.
Trauma and the dysfunctional mind: My Story.
Sharing is caring, I love that saying. As someone with an ADHD mind, I have the advantage of having a caring nature, lots of empathy, someone that wants to help people. By sharing my story, my wish is that I can help those who resonate with my past experiences, and help them move on into greener pastures.
Storytelling goes back to our ancient ancestors and has its roots in developing people, healing and creating strong adventurous minds.
You know deep down something is wrong with you, but you don’t know what it is. There is a fear that eats away and consumes your soul, but you don’t know why or how it's there. You go through life unsettled, lonely, looking over your shoulder looking for what you don’t know.
Sonna Aronaran .
If you know you have adult ADHD or think you might have it, take time to read this article from 'ADDITUDE' https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-in-adults-nervous-system/
It will answer a lot of questions for you and other people that don't get you.
Chapter One.
Guns to our heads.
Imagine being a few weeks old, being pulled out of your mother’s arms; having a gun to your head and being used as a tool to keep people in fear for their lives. My mum had managed to get herself into some hefty trouble. I always thought she loved the man she made me with, but now I believe she was petrified of him and lived in fear as he watched over her. A disturbed, menacing man who lived a couple of miles up the road from us. All fairy tales have a dark, seedy underbelly story to tell.
Its the demon that connects with the baby that stays the longest.
Thursday 18 - 9 -24
Beating myself up for not getting the writing done.
I do have the plan to write or edit what I have written, but things get in the way, distractions send the planned writing exercise up into the ether. This does worry me when I seem to lose a week or more without writing, then I go into beating myself up mode. When I look closer at what has distracted me it’s not all about suffering from procrastination, losing interest, or going onto something else. Looking back, I've been very busy making things happen, like yesterday. I planned to write yesterday, got out of bed at 6.30 had my usual coffee checked the news, uploaded a video onto Facebook, checked Instagram and found a very interesting article on an alchemy course. Got ready for the day, shower and breakfast. 9 am went off to my mentoring course. Finished the course at 12.30 went for a coffee with someone to explain the men’s group I'm starting in a couple of weeks (lots of prep work for that) came home had lunch then went for my power swim at 3.30pm. 5.30 pm went back to the learning centre for a networking social event. Back home at 7 pm, prepped an evening meal, had a glass of wine, and only had the energy and focus for a movie.
Taking a little time to look back and do a bit of self-analysing I realised most of the last two weeks have been like this and that’s why the writing has taken a back seat. A lot of other important things have been successfully accomplished in creating this website, my community interest company, and my fitness, and healthy eating plan.
If you're like me and beat yourself up for not sticking to one plan, check the other plans that have been going on, and maybe instead of beating yourself up you need to pat yourself on the back instead.
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